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TRADITIONALLY, WHO DOES WHAT?
Many weddings nowadays are funded entirely by the bride and groom who will obviously have the final say in all matters. However, as your wedding is special to your loved ones too, they may consider it an honour to have particular duties before and during your special day. Here we give guidelines of the traditional roles played by members of the bridal party. For the modern wedding they can be shared or entirely interchangeable.
THE BRIDE

Chooses wedding date, type of ceremony, the theme of the wedding and her outfit
Chooses her attendants and their outfits
Co-ordinates and advises other members of the bridal party on dress codes, colours, etc
Throws her bouquet amongst the unmarried female guests
Writes thank you notes to helpers and for wedding gifts
Buys a wedding present for the groom


THE GROOM

Works out the budget
Buys the wedding rings
Arranges the outfits of the male members of the bridal party
Arranges the honeymoon and the wedding night accommodation
Buys gifts for the best man, bridesmaids and ushers
Makes a speech at the reception, on behalf of himself and his new wife


THE BEST MAN

Helps groom choose his outfits and those of the male attendants
Arranges the “stag do”
Meets at the ceremony venue, along with the ushers, to discuss seating and parking arrangements.
Attends the wedding rehearsal
Collects hire wear for himself and the groom
Collects cards or messages from those who cannot attend wedding
Makes sure that ushers have order of service sheets and buttonholes
Helps the groom dress on the morning of the wedding and makes sure he gets to the church on time
On behalf of the groom, discreetly pays the church fees, tips and bell ringers fees
Produces the rings when required and gives them to the groom or the officiate
Escorts the chief bridesmaid to the signing of the register (he is usually a witness)
Escorts the chief bridesmaid from the ceremony
Checks arrangements with the ushers that all guests have transport to the reception
In the absence of a Toastmaster, or Master of Ceremonies, announces events. (For example, calling for the first speech, the cutting of the cake and the departure of the bride and groom)
Makes a speech and reads out messages
Decorates the “going away” car
Helps transport wedding gifts from the reception to a safe place
After the wedding, returns groom’s hire wear if necessary


CHIEF BRIDESMAID

Helps the bride choose her outfit and her attendants’ outfits
Helps the bride keep her wedding lists up-to-date
Organises the “hen do”
Attends the rehearsal
Helps arrange and supervise a timetable for the bride on the day so she’s not always watching the clock
Helps the bride and her attendants get ready on the day
At the ceremony venue, before the brides entrance, checks brides attire and lines up the attendants
Holds the brides bouquet during the ceremony
Escorted by the best man, attends the signing of the register (she is usually a witness)
Walks with the best man out of the ceremony
Takes her place in the receiving line
Places her bouquet, along with the brides, by the wedding cake
Helps serve the cake
Helps the bride prepare for “going away”, takes charge of the wedding attire
Along with the best man, helps transport the wedding gifts from the reception to a safe place


FLOWER GIRL

Carries a basket of flowers or flower petals
Joins in the procession with the other attendants
Walks back down the aisle in front of the bride and groom strewing flowers in their path (Of course, you need to check with the venue beforehand that this is acceptable)


USHERS

Before the wedding day meets with the best man to work out duties. Plan parking arrangements and get to know where the nearest toilets are
Collect order of service sheets from the bride or best man
Provide umbrellas in case of rain
Arrive first at the ceremony venue
Organise parking
Ensure that the approach is clear for the Bride’s arrival
Greet guests and distribute buttonholes, order of service sheets and hymn books. (At a formal wedding the ushers have a list of guests so that close family and relatives are escorted to the front seats)
Make sure all guests switch off mobile phones
Explain situation regarding flash photography
Escort the bride’s mother and elderly guests to their seats
Provide guard of honour
Help photographer/videographer organise people for group shots
During photography have a picnic hamper available with cool drinks and fold up chairs for elderly guests
Help best man organise transport for the guests to the reception
To prevent a long queue arrange for a few guests at a time to go along the receiving line
Be responsible for a few tables each at the reception to check on a regular basis that everyone is happy
Make sure all guests are seated for the speeches
Greet evening guests
Get guests applauding during bride and grooms first dance and then get everyone up and dancing
Line up guests when bride and groom leave


BRIDE'S MOTHER

Arranges press announcements
Compiles the guest list in consultation with the groom’s family
Sends out invitations and keeps a note of replies
Looks after gift list and makes arrangements to display the presents
Makes a list of the guests for the ushers
In the absence of the bride’s father she may give the bride away
Attends the signing of the register
Unless bride and groom decide otherwise, acts as hostess on the day
Leaves the church on the arm of the groom’s father
The first in the receiving line
Sends cake to those unable to attend the wedding


BRIDE'S FATHER

Attends the wedding rehearsal
Travels with his daughter to the ceremony
Escorts the bride down the aisle
Gives the bride away
Attends the signing of the register
Escorts the groom’s mother from the church
Stands alongside his wife in the receiving line


Image courtesy of Russell Lewis Photography - 01544 319289 - www.russelllewisphotography.co.uk
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